OK well I don’t have any. No really I don’t I am a chicken shit, even here in my blog. If you don’t know what Internet Balls are Kristine at Random and Odd who made it in to the Urban Dictionary with that word says it is:
“When you think you can sit behind your computer screen and write whatever you want, to whomever you want. These are not things you would say to the person if you were face to face. That would require having balls when you're away from your computer...which you don't. Internet balls are only obtained while behind the screen and keyboard.”
I lack them. Seriously I do. I say all kinds of things. I have wanted to blog my thoughts about all kinds of things, things that people I know have done. People they date, hell people I date, stupid things they have done. But I keep it off my blog. I haven’t got the balls to do it.
I have drafted several little ditties about people in my life only to delete them. And if you have to ask me if it was you then the answer is yes it was you. That may be why I don’t blog a lot there is not a lot going on. I don’t have kids, a husband or boyfriend, or crazy co-workers to regal you with tales of that cute little thing that my kid did today or my co-worker is so crazy. It is just me and my boss in my office and as Dooce has taught us all don’t go bashing your boss on your blog if you want to keep your job. Not that I mind that stuff. I read blogs of people that talk about their families daily.
I just don’t think people will want to know that stuff about me. I work I sleep I repeat some days I work two jobs. I think about ex- beaus and sometimes go as far as to try and google them see if I can’t track them down give them a call. Do you people really want to hear that stuff? I am sure he does and I think he reads this blog. That can put a stop to what you say in a blog.
Knowing that your friend Sally reads your blog and you think her husband Kyle is a total jack ass and he did this really obnoxious thing, like he always does, and Sally knows he did but she likes to live as if he is some Saint and if you put down that event and your thought about it then the little Fantasy Land that Sally lives in is shattered and she no longer wants to speak to you. But really it is not Sally that you no longer wish to see. So we all sit in a little group and talk about Kyle and the blinders that Sally goes through life wearing. Now if Sally were to ask me all bets would be off. But Sally is not going to ask me. Sally knows better. So I don’t blog about it because if Sally wanted the truth she would have it.
What I over all aim for is something that would be of interest to my friends without crossing that line of alienating the friends I have. With a dose of humor mixed in. Does one of my friends really need to know what I use to remember their birthday each year? I think it is funny but would they? The likely hood is YES they are a friend and my humor is one of my best qualities. But I don't put it here for fear of upsetting them. So sometimes you need internet balls.
So I am going to try and blog more about what is going on in my life and find a happy medium between what I to tell some of my friends but not the rest of them. I also have to make up my mind if I want to name my friends or give them colorful nicknames. This would be the point where my friends chime in and say hey don’t use my name. But then if I give you nicknames then it might be easier to confuse some of you. Then you wouldn’t know for sure if I was talking about you or not. Because for some of you ‘Shamus’ I can point to something shinny and you forget I am talking about you.
Look over there Dolce and Gabbana on sale.