Friday, November 30, 2007

Sanity




Somehow I am not sure I know who that person is out of my group of friends. I think we are all a little off kilter. Some of us are more "normal" than others but we don't hold that against you Kim really we don't. We all love you despite the lack of insanity.
I get the feeling that some days I suffer from enough insanity for everyone I know, Except for Jon no one needs to be that crazy. But then I think we all have those days. It will be a bad day when we all go ape shit together. But that would involve tequila. We should all get together and test that theory. Who wants to join me?

Saturday, November 24, 2007

Seven Things

Though I was not tagged to list 7 things you might not know about me I thought I would give it a shot. I am not going to tag any of you just check your blogs till you post it.


1. I have been known to listen to Conservative Talk Radio. I don’t agree
with it but I listen.
2. I am part of a Ghost Hunting Group
3. I have a Ball Gown in my closet just in case
4. I love seafood.
5. Caffeine triggers my migraines so I avoid it. This does not include
chocolate
6. I love to cook. One of my favorite things is to make bread by hand.
7. When I was a kid I was scared of the Sandman.

Monday, November 19, 2007

Putting a lid on it

I would like to be able to say that I have moved passed the overwhelming desirer to become a mother but I haven’t. I was all boo hooey last week sitting in my office crying over what I don’t have, A husband and a child. I know people are trying to be kind when they tell me about women having kids into their forties. But it hurts. It is painful.
I am lonely painfully lonely and it is not a pain right now that friends can fill. I miss the intimacy of being in a relationship. But then I depress myself even more because I like to think of myself as HAPPILY single but I miss being in a relationship and find myself lonely. I don’t know if that is a mix I can fully explain. I hate to even admit that I am lonely IT IS AN UGLY CYCLE. Round and round I go.
So here I sit lonely with the overwhelming desire to be a mother. Not a good mix. I know that I will move past lonely this is a phase. But the tick, tick , tick remains but for now there is a lid in my pain.