Of the things I am to old for

I learned this weekend it is those awesome road trips I used to take when I was young I am to old for. And I define road trips as being unplanned, not completely thought out. Which Jon who started this mess is good for not well thought out road trips. He is spontaneous.
Jon and his wife called me Saturday afternoon maybe around 2:30pm asking what I was doing for the next 24 hours. Once we made it through all the fore play with words. Jon informs me that he has bought a new motorcycle on eBay. Some Honda RC51 1000cc thing a ma bob. But it is Dallas. DALLAS,TX. I knew I could not drive down there and back alone. I asked him to find someone to help me drive and he did. We left out of Nashville at 1:30 AM and hit the road. We were held up an hour and a half around 6am for a wreck. If you don't know the roads in Arkansas suck bricks. At some random stop we did see the Oscar Mayer Winner Mobile. I failed to get a picture because I was driving. Sorry : (
We arrived at the Bike Shop in Dallas at 1PM. Though the bike Jon bought was not in freakin Dallas it was in FREAKIN Ft. Worth. OK not really that big a deal. Because that is why they call the airport the Dallas, Fort Worth airport. But I am giving Jon shit. Because I can and it is my job.
Jon's new bike is cool as hell.


Then we began our trip back home. I was supposed to be sleeping. As we pulled out of town I saw Six Flags



I could not get to sleep. But I did get a picture of Jon showing off on his new toy.



Still I didn't get any real sleep and when my turn came to drive I only got in a few hours of drive time in. My eyes began to cross and water. I was raising my glasses to clear my eyes. It was somewhere around Jackson that I got a new burst of energy and could see straight. I made just outside of Jackson before I was asked to pull over so I did not kill everyone in the car. At 2:30 AM and 1400 miles later we made it home. I got home and hit the hay and could not move all day Monday. I thought for sure I would just sleep late and go into work late and be fine. WRONG. Oh how wrong I was. I could not move. I took a shower with the intent of going out and grabbing some lunch surely if I ate I would feel better. I dressed and had to lay back down I went back to sleep. When I woke up again I tried to head to the door then I decided I should just order food. There is no way I could make it out the door that in and of itself took me 20 minutes. I ordered a pizza and passed out. When the pizza arrived I got a slice and ate half of it and passed out again. When I woke up 3 hours later I turned on the oven to heat my cold pizza ate the rest of my half eaten pizza and well napped again. I never did heat up the cold pizza and I still went to bed at 10 and slept all night. I was still a little hazy this morning.
I am not cut out for long road trips. That there kicked my ass.

The Good News!!!!

As promised I am finally going to tell what I have been holding onto and has been causing me to wain on staying at Domino's. We arrived in the office on Tuesday the Sept. 30 to find a letter from the State telling us we have been approved for to provide Personal Assistant Service (PA). YAY!!! I have been waiting on this since we submitted our application, Hell I can't even remember when it has been so long.

We are still waiting on a few things. A background check on the company's owner. We have to submit a new one for this. Then send in finical statements. But as things stand now we should be providing P.A. services by the first of the year. We might start sooner but my boss is leaving the country the for the Christmas Holiday and that could put us starting after the New Year. So it looks like the last few years of hard is is going to be paying off.

This leaves me now to explain what is holding me back from looking for another second job. Not that I have changed my mind about going out there and putting in an application . I haven't and I will be looking. I will be over all the PA's. So when there are staffing issues I will be the one responsible for dealing with it. Meaning missing work at job two for problems on job one. But, I will also be getting a big fat raise with the new PA Service. UGH life.

But that is the good news.

I sent two boats

You know that old joke " There came a great rain storm and Bob told his family he was going to stay at the house and God would save him.Bob prayed for God to save and protect him. After the water level reached the porch a canoe came but Bob told them , No I am going to stay God will look after me. Bob prayed for God to save and protect him. Later the water level was at the bottom of the second floor window and a motor boat came by. They tried in vain to get Bob in the boat but he told them NO God will save me. Bob prayed for God to save and protect him. When the water had reach the roof a helicopter arrived but Bob waved them off. Bob prayed for God to save and protect him. Bob reached the pearly gates and met God he looked at him and said God how could you I was a good man I prayed and yet you did not save me. God looked at Bob and said My Son I sent 2 boats and a helicopter what more did you want me to do? "

I have begun to think I am taking this approach with finding a different second job. Though today gas has finally dropped down below $3.00 a gallon in Nashville business is still slow and tips are off. I have made-up a million reason to stay most of them involve me not taking my job that seriously and I can call in and not get fired. The job is a cake walk. Three stores in the area have closed, they are all for sale , distributors are not delivering because they are not getting paid and some pay checks are bouncing. Where I come from this is not a good sign. The owner is selling because he did not meet franchise mandates. I joked to the manager that between the four days I go without working I am never sure if when I pull in on Thursday the store will still be open.
I am going to make it my mission in the next week to apply to at least three places. I am thinking Target, Best Buys, and Restoration Hardware. They will need holiday help. After the holidays well that is on my blog list and I promise to tell you the good news I have been sitting on this weekend. At some point , maybe , if I don't think of something else.
I am also going to call you and ask to use you as a reference so sit by your phone damn it and wait.

Do you know my Secret

Last Friday I took a somewhat rare night off Domino's for a double date. With two of favorite people GQ and Jack. As my friends and readers know I am a HUGE PostSecert fan. I love Frank. Not many people/ groups warrant a second visit from me but Frank and his secrets do.

Frank was at Vanderbilt for a Facebook event last Friday night and I called up my Mom and she got the three of us tickets.
We had a totally great dinner at BrickTops it was a little pricey but it was good. If there is one near you I say give it a try. In fact our waiter looked like Frank. I had a Chilean Sea Bass that was out of this world. The food was good and it was HOT!! As in I had to let it cool off so I could eat it. I think it is always a plus when you eat out and you have to wait for the food to cool. Means it has not sat in the window waiting to come to the table. I also had a pineapple martini not as sweet as I thought it would have been but not a bad little drink it is not sweet like a pina colada.

Post Secret started as small community art project in Washington, D.C. Where people mail in their secrets anonymously The rules are as follows: It must be something you have never told anyone and it must be true. Frank says there are two kinds of secrets those we keep from others and those we keep from ourselves.


I wont say that I am an open book but the people that I trust those that know me know what I have done that shames me. Know my dark fears. Know the things about me that I don't put here in the open.
It is the secrets from myself that get in my way. Since Friday I have been thinking what am I keeping from myself? What am I to afraid to admit? When I figure it out I'll let you know.
What Secret are you keeping?

Saving Receipts

In this quest of mine to save money I decided that this week I am going to start saving receipts I have not been doing so hot thus far. This morning I could not get a receipt for my gas from the pump and I was way too lazy to go in and ask for one. But who really wants to remember what they are paying for gas?
I also went through the drive thru at Chick-Fil-A and did not get a receipt I forgot to ask. I was thinking that if I could SEE the money I was wasting at the drive thru I might spend less. I don’t know what happened to me. When I lived in Chattanooga I made an effort to pack my lunch because I wanted to save money what happened to that woman? I never ate out and now I live in the drive thru. I had a plan and some how I lost that. We are all in a though economic time and I can’t get my shit together

So I am going to start saving my receipts to see what I am wasting each week. That is this weeks Nickel and Dime tip save your receipts. See what you waste.

I Have a List ….

I stated that I was going to start making list of blog topics. I have a running list of things that pop in my head to tell ya’ll. Right now there are ten. Count them 10. This post is not among them so I should be able to keep you busy for about 2 weeks more if I write like I usually do. There are all kinds of events coming up which make my list grow so I could in all reality keep you busy through the first part of 2009. Don’t let the shock kill you. There are much better things to die of shock over.

Speaking of shock nah I got nothing. I can’t decide if as I get older I shock easier or it is more like that whole Clay Aiken is gay shock. Where you roll your eyes and try not to choke on the sarcasm. I myself am not at all familiar with sarcasm never used use it. Some over educated dill weed of a therapist once told me I was using sarcasm to mask pain and emotion. I looked at him and said, “ya think?” But, I know that comes as a shock to you.

Though I think shock can arrive in many forms there is the

“JESUS CHRIST!!” shock, where the eyes bug out the mouth drops open and you just stand there in total stunned disbelief.

“HOLY SHIT!!” shock where you fall into a chair cover your mouth with your hand and shake your head back and forth and say “Shit/ Damn” over and over again.

“OH MY GOD!” shock where you are elated a huge grim arrives on your face you might jump up and down with delight.

Choke, Gag, Clang Shock This starts when someone makes an announcement in the middle of dinner that comes out of the blue but is typically followed by one of the above once everyone is done choking, gagging and dropping their fork. Like when your 16-year-old sister says in the middle of dinner “I’m pregnant, pass the corn.”

I think my last SHOCK was the great birthday gift I got from Stephlys I was like WOW!! The whole trip was a wow.

Other times I think the shock comes when I have devalued myself worth and I am asked to join in an event and I think “ME?” that is the shock I want to let go of the one where I am totally surprised that people value me.

Well this was a turn I was not expecting. Talk about shock.

What was that again ?

I have this horrible habit of coming up with what I think are great subject ideas to blog about. I am working at the office or riding down the road and I will get this great idea I will start to kind of process it and think about what I want to tell you worshipers. You know I will get an outline going in my head. I get all excited about it and then it is gone.

It is not like I am just losing Political ideas I am losing that Friday Night was great idea and how it was great. I will have several ideas going and none of them come make it here. Right now in my head I have like 4 going by in the morning they will all be gone.

I have come up with what I think is going to be a more favorable solution to keeping up with my ideas which may help me blog more often. I am going to jot my ideas down as they come to me. I keep a small notebook at my desk and in my car I am just going to have it put it to use . But knowing the way my brain has been working lately I will lose the paper.

Quote for the day

( borrowed)

"As this debacle continues, and CEOs walk away with boatloadsof cash, and the government is now considering owning banks, i am reminded of an old saying (source unknown)

If you put a government agency in charge of the Sahara Desert---it would soon run out of sand!"

Home Town Debate

I am watching the debate from my home town of Nashville, TN. I can't decide if I wish I was down there now or here at home where I am.

Nickel and Dime

Several years ago I saw this woman on the Today Show and she shopped for her family of 5 and would spend less than $20 a week. Give or take. One day last week I saw another story about a woman who feeds her family of four for about that each week. So I figured I could do this maybe not as well for many many reason. If you are going to only spend $10 to $20 week on groceries you can’t be as picky as I am. They say you need at least 2 hours a week to keep it organized

I.e. you have to be willing to buy the kind of soap that you have a coupon for. This is going to put a damper on my getting by with $20 a week.

This week after clipping my coupons from this weeks and last weeks paper I went through the sale papers looked at the sales. I went to Publix which has a penny mystery item every Sunday and Monday if you spend $10 or more I saved almost $12 and spent $81.00 but shrimp was on sale.

It is going to take a lot of work and a lot of planning but you my loyal reader will be kept up to date on how it goes.

Here are a few tips:

Here in Nashville Kroger gives you .04 cents off your total for each reusable bag you use for your groceries.

Publix has a penny item Sunday and Monday

Again with the Gay Agenda

I have a wide group of friends some closer than others but there are just some things that we just agree to disagree on. The ones who are more conservative we just don’t talk about the liberal agenda or the right wing rhetoric. One friend every once in a blue moon I will get something that clearly shows her right thinking. I just smile and at least know that the busy Mom of two young children is thinking of me. But another in this political season has been inundating my in box with VILE HATE FILLED right wing crap. Which I had been politely just moving passed until last night when I received an email about the “Gay Agenda” apparently MacDonald’s has become a member of the National Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce (NGLCC). The email from the American Family Association was asking me to forward a form letter to MacDonald’s in protest to this action of following the “gay agenda” and to begin a boycott of the restaurant. The only protest I had been planning of MacDonald’s is the one for my waistline.

Needless to say I flipped. Told her “McDonald's will definitely be getting more of my Business I would hate to think I had been supporting HATE MONGERS. I will call them and thank them for SUPPORRTING EQUAL HUMAN RIGHTS FOR ALL HUMANS WHICH I support 100%. Places that use hate and dissemination as a means to get business have no place in my life. I will call and thank them!!!!!!
If this is the kind of HATE and Vile you are going to send please REMOVE Me from you email list!!!!!!!”

Was that a little much? Could I have just done with this last email what I had done with the rest? Sure I could. But, people who use Christ as a means to spread hate just sticks in my crawl. They are the folks that keep me out of church. People who think their sin is less than someone else’s. Plus I am a big supporter of Equal Human Rights for all Humans. I firmly believe that if you think something it not right you should stand up and take action and not just sit on your hunches and say, “well that’s just the way things are” So she was doing what she believed in and I felt it was time that I do what I believe in. That said eat more MacDonald’s.

# 2

I have been seriously thinking of looking for another 2nd job. I am just fucking over the first 2nd job. I never in all my life thought I would still be delivering pizzas almost 4 years after I started. I wanted to have spending money for Hawaii so I decided to deliver pizzas to earn the extra cash I needed ok wanted to go and have a good time. When I came home there were bills I said I needed to pay off. Then I lost my job, my health insurance and my mind.

Some months, most months I was not paying off debt but just getting by. I have paid off my student loan and a few other bills. But gas is through the roof, business is slow, and tips are down. We went from needing 6 to 8 drivers on a Friday night to needing 3. With my hourly minimum wage and tips I have been thinking I can earn about the same thing doing retail work like maybe at Target or Dillard’s and save on gas without the ware and tear on my car. It is just a thought. Either way I have made the decision to keep working two jobs until the mountain of bills is gone even after my car is paid off. The question of course is where? Unless of course tonight is the night I hit the lottery then I will tell everyone to go to hell.

Old?

You know you are old when:

they are talking about Oprah and Phil and you think Donahue and not Doctor.


OK what do you have?

Pinheads and Sexism

Yeah yeah yeah I am slow and I have been meaning for weeks to post this but hell here it is.

Shock or Potatoes

I am not sure what I am more shocked by the fact that Clay Aiken "The Gaykin" came out of the closet. Or that people still think that voting Republican is the way to go.

So Clay is gay. It is like going yeah and...? I had the same reaction when my buddy Ricky finally told me he was gay. He told me he was was gay and I was like OK pass the mashed potatoes. Alright not really. I went
"It is about FUCKING TIME!!! What took you so long."

Then Ricky slightly teary eyed looked at me and asked "How long have you known?"

"Um do you really really want to know?"

"Yes, Ferngoddess be honest with me."

I took a breath "the day you came sashaying in to work."

" you knew the day you meet me?"

"Yep pretty much."

" But, I didn't even know then."

"It's a power, what can I say."


Really shock would be if my red neck truck driving friend Greg told me he was going to vote Democrat.

Or that George Warde actually kept his word now that would shock me.

38 is gonna be great

Last weekend I wrapped up a month of celebrating turning 38 , with the theme 38 is gonna be great. One of my very dearest friends flew me out to visit her and her husband T in St. Petersburg , FL. She is for all technical purposes the mother of "Fern" she gave me the name either because I stutter or she is hard of hearing. But I love her and I have missed her so we reconnected. This is how we reconnected



This is how we reconnected on Saturday

Not such a bad way to spend a Saturday! In fact I was so relaxed I fell asleep and woke myself up snoring. Which would make my personal statement I get more relaxed in the mountains make one wonder what I would be like if I was relaxed in the mountains.

We walked , ate , talked , and laughed.

T cooked for us he makes awsome pancakes and a mean pizza.




This is how we reconnected on Sunday. I woke myself up snoring again on Sunday. What can I say.

Stephlys I love you. Thank you for a fabulous weekend.

In sequester

I came home one day last week came into my room and stayed. I have gone out to fix a plate and come back to my room. I have just felt the need for some time to myself. I get that way now and again just need my own space. Plus I do have a birthday coming up this week and I always like to reflect on how I have grown and what I would like to see for myself in the months to come.

If things go as planned right now I will have my car paid off before the end of the year. This will be a HUGE weight lifted off me. Then I can focus on my other debt. With that comes the question. Do I quit my second job and just pay off my debt as I can or do I keep the second job that I despise and get it done quicker. I have been saying for the last year or so that by the time it is cold again I wont be there, by the time the holidays roll around I wont be here, by the time I need to wear shorts again I wont be there so when I had to go out and buy new shorts this season it hurt. Now I am moving back into the cold again I am faced with do I stay or do I go? I can’t quit until my car is paid for then I am going to have to reevaluate what needs to be done. As much as I would love to walk away from the second job I do have some semblance of good sense and will probably keep it until I get stuff paid off. I do have draw backs the price of gas has gone up tremendously, people are not ordering pizza like they used to so getting tips does not happen much. Here lately it is nothing to work 3 hours and only make 5 or 6 deliveries. This is not good. But again once my car is paid off I will look at this again.

Then I have the baby thing it is still there I still want one. The desire to have children has not gone anywhere and it is still not something I am willing to negotiate with a man.

The man thing well when you work two jobs and are busy on Friday and Saturday nights dating is hard. Not that I have ever been a dater. I am more a sit at home on Friday night kinda gal. However I want the option to go out go places do things.

So I am looking forward to 38 I for the most part like where I have come from and what I have done with 37

The R- Word

I want you all to take just a moment to look at this CUTE little video.
http://www.blueberryshoes.com/


For those of you that don't know I work for and with people with Intellectual Disabilities. They are the lights in my life and bring me such pure joy. I don't even see the "disability". Each person is special they are active vibrant members of their community. They are Friends , Co-workers, roommates. They volunteer in the community, go to church, shop , and pay taxes. They are perceptive. They laugh , joke and play. They marry and have families. And they have FEELINGS.

They are not as some have said to stupid , dense, or intelligent to know what was going. Words hurt and they know this.

Letting Go

Sometimes we all cling to the silliest of things. I know I do. I still have tokens for River Bend in Chattanooga I have not lived in Chattanooga for 8 years now why do I need these things? I am a pack rat. So last night when the seat busted out of my all time FAVORITE pair of comfy pants. The ones I come home when I have had a crappy day and put on ,the ones when I feel bad I put on , sometimes they are my bitchy pants and any woman out there should know what I mean. So I thought twice about what I was going to do sow them up and stitch up the other holes in them or let them go. But I love em the big question is will I leave them there. Good Bye Comfy pants I will miss you.

This is the day that has No end

It is not even Noon yet in my little part of the world and I thought for sure I would be home by now. Because there is no way I could have been here this long and it not be close to three. But it is not close to three it is close to noon and has taken for freakin ever to get this late. After being in the office an hour I looked at the clock and could not believe it just nine!! I was sure that the clock on the wall in my office was dying so I keep check my watch and the clock on the computer but no this day is moving at a snails pace.
What did I do for a day like this enjoy my weekend? Which by the way was a blast. I got home from Domino's early enough to see most of the Teams enter for the Opening Ceremonies of the Olympics. Of course I cried. Libby and I waited as the United States Of America entered we commented to each other that many of the other countries that were all Asian , Black , White , or this or that but when the USA entered it was a little of this and a little of that. One team is all male because women have no rights ( IT IS FINALLY FUCKING NOON!!!) But we have it all a beautiful mix of it all and I cried. I am such a sap.
Saturday was my Adsagsona Paranormal Group Meeting we are planning a trip in October to Mountain City, TN to check out a B&B there. Once we all had gotten a room we talked about the cost things are tight for us all. We might be going some place else but we are in a wait and see mode. Due to raising cost we also lost our meeting space and we are all taking turns hosting at our houses. This months had a pool. So we all got in. Sad to say but this was the first time I have been in a swim suit all summer.
I had gotten my hands on passes to Nashville Shores (Hermitage Landing). One of my friends GQ had his kids for summer so I went with GQ, his partner Jack and the three kids. This would make twice this year I was in a swim suit. TWO DAYS IN A ROW. We had such fun. I had not been at Nashville Shores since I was small. The slides were a blast. I will say with younger folk it works best to do one adult one child.
I have no excuse for my lack of posting I keep saying I'll do it but now I am doing it. So there.
I have some really really exciting stuff coming up and I most defiantly will be writing about that. There should be a great post tomorrow about shrimp.